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小学生英语故事包括幽默故事（1 7 页） 、普通小故事（7 40 页） 。激发小朋友们学英语的兴趣，帮助他们提高成绩。最好每天背一篇，会有不错的效果的 O∩ ∩O英文幽默故事There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was 5,000; another one, 10,000; and the third one, 30,000. The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is 5,000 That’s so expensive for this kindof parrot.” The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.” So the customer asked him, “How about this guy What can he do that makes him so expensive” The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That’s why he’s so expensive.” Then the customer said, “How about the third one What canhe do that makes him so expensive” The owner of the shopsaid, “I don’t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all But the other two call him ‘The Boss.’” 老板最大 有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉，其中一只卖五千元，另一只卖一万元，还有一只卖三万元。顾客问老板「为什么这只要卖五千元这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了」老板说「因为我有训练他讲话。 」顾客又问「那这只呢他会做什么为什么要卖这么贵」老板说「他除了会说话之外，还会表演一些有趣的动作，好比说跳舞等等，所以才卖这么贵。 」顾客接着又问「那第三只呢他会做什么为什么要卖这么贵」老板说「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌，也没看过他跳舞，什么都没有不过另外两只叫他『老板』 」Where is the eggTeacherCan you make a sentence with the word eggStudentYes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.TeacherThen where is the “eggStudentIn the cake,Sir.鸡蛋在哪里老师你能用“ 鸡蛋” 一词造句吗学生可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。老师“鸡蛋 ”在哪学生在蛋糕里，先生 Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket. But a girl asks him,“Why do you buy so many tickets How many friends do you meet” “No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.”汤姆是个小孩， 他才 7 岁。 当他去电影院的时候。那时他第一次去。他买了张票进去了。 但没过两三分钟他就出来了，然后买了第二张票又进去了。 几分钟后他又出来买了第三张票。 接着两三分钟后他又出来买票。 一个女的问她， “你为什么要买那么多票啊 你见到了几个朋友 没有， 我里面没朋友， 但是每当我进门的时候一位大的女人老把我的票给剪了 ChildMy uncle has 1000 men under him.ManHe is really somebody.What does doChildA maintenance man in a cemetery 他真是一个大人物小孩我叔叔下面有 1000 个人。男人他真是一个大人物。他是干什么的小孩墓地守墓人。Teacher Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today Student Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.一名伟人 老师如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗学生当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到 400 多岁。Mr. Smith Waiter, theres a dead fly in my soup. Waiter Yes, sir, I know its the heat that kills it.史密斯先生服务员，我的汤里有一只死苍蝇． 服务员是的，先生，我知道了，它是被烫死的．Son Dad, give me a dime. Father Son, dont you think youre getting too big to be forever begging for dimes Son I guess youre right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you 儿子爸爸，给我一角钱。 父亲儿子，你不认为你已经长大了，不该再老是一角一角地要钱了该自立了，不是吗儿子爸爸，我想你是对的，那给我一块钱行吗A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they’re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight year oldkid came back home and asked his father, “Father, is it expensive to be married” And the father said, “Yes, son, it is very expensive.” So the son asked, “How much does it cost” And the father said, “I don’t know, son. I’m still paying.” 有个小孩爱上了另一个小孩，对方是学校的同学。八岁或十岁左右的孩子有时会迷恋班上某个人，然后就以为自己恋爱了。因此这个八岁的小孩回家问他爸爸「爸爸，结婚很花钱吗」爸爸说「是啊，儿子，非常花钱。 」儿子又问「要花多少钱呢」爸爸说「我不知道，儿子，我到现在还一直在付钱啊」Boy, why have you got cotton wool in your ear Is it infected No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it. “孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵它感染了吗” “没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。 ” “Im sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boys tooth .” “Twenty d ollars Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work” “Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .” “对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取 20 美元。 ” “20 美元为什么不是说好只要 4 美元。 ” “是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。 ” TWO TeacherWe all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example JohnWell ， in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short. 老师我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理。现在，谁给我举个例子 约翰嗯，在夏天天都长，在冬天天都短。 The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said heLet me ask the evolutionist a question if we had tails like a baboon, where are they Ill venture an answer, said an old lady. We have worn them off sitting here so long.. 教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了“让我向进化论者提个问题如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了” “我来试试看， ”一位老太太说。 “该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。 ” A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He s
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